Getting married as a young adult is changing very much these days. I said to my fiancé the other day, “I am getting married at 24. It’s crazy how that is considered YOUNG.” My reasoning behind this was preempted by my parents who were married at 22 and 20. When my grandparents got married it was not uncommon to be married at 17 or 18, yet nowadays 24 is considered young for marriage. What has changed? What is the “right time” to get married?
In recent years, most people have been focusing on solidifying a career before settling down to get married. Who can blame them? With unemployment still at a very uncomfortable rate and what seems like no job security, coupled with an unprecedented high cost of living, I believe that most people struggle to get by and therefore do not want to subject their spouse and children to that. There is something missing in that equation—trust in God.
I know of a few couples who are called to marry one another, they know it, but they do not take the next step because of financial uncertainty. To clarify, none of these couples are by any means near the poverty line. Yet, for some reason in this country the American Dream is pushing us to strive for ideals, forgo sacrifice, and place control into our own hands rather than relying on God’s mercy. So the thought process becomes: I need to have ‘x’ amount of money in the bank before I get engaged and plan my wedding; I need to have worked my way to middle management before I have a child; I need, I need, I need. Since when do we really know what we need and when we need it? The right time to get married is in God’s time. Instead of thinking about what we want when we want it, let’s try thinking about what God wants when God wants it.
When I decided to get engaged last June, I was making next to nothing. I was a Graduate Assistant at Seton Hall, which paid a monthly stipend that barely paid my expenses. I had no clue what I would do in terms of a career. I had a little bit of money in the bank saved from when I was young (I had jobs since I was 13 years old), but I knew that God was calling me to do this. I knew he wanted me to trust in Him because I knew He would provide me with what I needed. I didn’t need a six-figure salary and a house. What I needed to do was trust in God’s plan for my life—I trusted in HIS DREAM for me, not the American Dream.
As you are reading this article this Sunday, July 10, I am saying my vows at Sacred Heart R.C. Church in Clifton. I will be marrying my high school sweetheart of over eight years. Olivia and I wish for our marriage to become a witness to others that worldly prosperity is not a necessary component to following God’s will. In fact, this week’s gospel speaks of having the word of God literally in your face, yet you cannot see nor hear it. Take these words to heart as you discern God’s calling in your own life. Perhaps God is calling you to take the next step in your relationship. Maybe He is calling you to serve Him as a priest, deacon, or in the religious life. He may want you to live a single life. Regardless of your calling, do not turn a blind eye or a deaf ear to it. Answer it. When? Now. Take the step, and watch what beauty God will unfold in your life. Allow His words fall on the rich soil of your hearts so that it can “produce fruit, a hundred or sixty or thirtyfold.”
No comments:
Post a Comment